270 Multi-Coloured Swap Shop

First  watched  : 2  October  1976

Although  I don't  regard  this  show  with  special   affection  it  does seem  like  another  milestone  emerging  through  the  murk  of  childhood  memory.  I  had  not  long  started  secondary  school  but  there's  a  more  particular  memory  associated  with  the  programme. During  the  summer  my  mum  had  become  concerned  at  a  couple  of  speech  defects  I  apparently  had. One  was  pronouncing  r's  as  w's  Roy  Jenkins-style ; the  other  th's  as  f's. The  latter  could  be  corrected  by  a  few  sessions  with  a  speech  therapist  but  the  former  was  caused  by  my  tongue  being  too  firmly  anchored  and  I  had  to  have  a  simple  operation  to  free  it  up  a  bit  requiring  general  anaesthetic  at  Rochdale  Infirmary.

Genome  has  confirmed  the  date of  the  operation  to  be  Friday  8th  October  1976. I  know  this  because  my  mum  said  I  would  have  to  stay  in  all  day  on  the  Saturday  after  having  anaesthetic  and  my  consolation - along  with  my  first  packet  of  Top  Trumps  ( Locomotives  which  I  still  have )  - was  being  able  to  watch  the  whole  of  the exciting  new  programme  which  I'd  caught  the  tail  end  of  the  week  before.

Before  Multi-Coloured  Swap  Shop  Saturday  mornings  were  a  graveyard  slot  largely  occupied  by  repeated  cartoons  and  vintage  comedy  films  ( Laurel  and  Hardy, Chaplin , Abbott  and  Costello  etc ).  The  cartoons  were  incorporated  into  the  Swap  Shop   ( the  "Multi-Coloured"  was  dropped  after  a  while  ) format  but  with  colour  TV   now  the  norm   ( not  for  us  yet  ),   the  old  films  largely  disappeared  from  BBC1  from  this  point.  

It's  hard  to  recall  what  exactly  captivated  me  on  first  viewing  the  show. Perhaps  it  was  just  the   sheer  length  of  the  show; it  seemed  like  a  major  triumph  that  a  children's  show  had  been  given  most  of  the  morning  rather  than  being  squeezed  in  between  Nai  Zindagi  and  the  cricket.  I  would  also  have  been  pleased  to  see  a  familiar  face  from  Top  of  the  Pops  at  the  helm.

This  of  course  was  the  beginning  of  Noel  Edmunds's  rise  to  the  top  of  the  telly  tree. For  all  the  brickbats  thrown  his  way  over  the  years,  the  abstemious  ultra-professional  took  command  of  an  unprecedented  three-hour  kids'  show  completely  live  and  reliant  on  technology  working  and  children  behaving  themselves. And  he  nailed  it  completely ; Ant  and  Dec  acknowledge  him  as  the  Godfather  of  their  art.

His  three  main  co-presenters  are  all  still  working  in  TV  today,  another  reason  why  it  doesn't  seem  too  long  ago.  I  suppose  Keith  Chegwin  , a  mildly  successful  child  actor  who'd  been  in  Polanski's  Macbeth , took  his  cues  from  the  Play  School  presenters, but  they  were  in  a  studio. He  was  out  in  the  rain  and  cold, bringing  his  manic  enthusiasm  from  some  car  park  in  the  provinces  where  kids  gathered  to  swap  their  Action  Man  for  a  Mastermind  game  and  his  style  seemed  astonishingly  fresh. Of  course  he  later  married  Maggie  Philbin  who  joined  the  programme  from  series  3  onwards. Making  up  the  quartet  was  Newsround  presenter  John  Craven,  basically  doing  an  extended  version  of  his  weekday  slot, though  he  was  allowed  to  show  a  lighter  side in  his  banter  with  Noel.

The  first  show  had  repeats  of  Hong  Kong  Phooey  and  Land  of  the  Dinosaurs,  pop  guests  Harpo  and  Flintlock  ( not  exactly  a  great  start ) ,  a  cookery  slot  with  Delia  Smith, star  guest  Elisabeth  Sladen  and  of  course  the  swap  board  allowing  viewers  to  phone  in  with  their  offers  though  you  had  to  be  pretty  quick  to  respond.

There  was  also  an  appearance  by  15  year  old  Peter  Gardiner  who  collected  light  bulbs,  an  item  which  came  to  be  seen  as  typical  of  the  show.  One  lad  infamously  appeared  accompanied  by   his  collection  of  World  War  2  artifacts  with  a  Nazi  flag  draped  over  the  couch  behind  him. There  was  a  perception  that  Swap  Shop  favoured   the  same  sort  of  middle  class  kids  that  appeared  on  Ask  The  Family.  On  the  other  hand  you  could  view  it  as  giving  the  geek  a  chance  to  shine.

Inevitably  with  the  magazine  format  there'd  be  items  that  were  less  absorbing  than  others  and  I  remember  that,  even  while  watching  that  second   edition,  my  interest  started  to  flag  before  the  end. I  don't  know  if  it  was  on  that  particular  episode  but  early  on  they  had  patrician  newsreader  Richard  Baker  on  the  couch  discussing  what  piece  of  classical  music  would  best  suit  a  small  film  of  a  kitten  playing  and  I  remember  thinking  what  child  is  going  to  find  this  entertaining ?

So  after  that  I  rarely  watched  the  whole  show  and  it  wasn't  long  before  I  found  something  much  better  to  do  on  Saturday  mornings. By  co-incidence  that  ended  ( something  I've  never  fully  come  to  terms  with  )  pretty  much  at  the  same  time  Swap  Shop  did  ( March  1982 )   when  Noel  moved  into  adult  TV  with  The  Late  Late  Breakfast  Show . Except  it  didn't  really  end  there. The  remaining  trio  were  all  re-engaged  to  work  on  successor  show  Saturday  Superstore   with  Edmunds-wannabe  Mike  Read ( the  two  men  are  not  exactly  bosom  buddies ). The  swapping  element  was  ditched  but  otherwise  it  was  pretty  much  the  same  show  and  the  formula  has  endured  through  the  decades.

I'm  aware  I've  ignored  the  elephant  in  the  room  that  usually  crops  up  whenever  Swap  Shop  is  discussed  but  for  me,  apart  from  length  and  time  slot,  that  show  had  little  in  common  with  it  and  it  was  more  or  less  a  coincidence  they  emerged  together.